So we've lived here for a year now. We have friends, we stay busy, kids are in sports and other activities. It's the normal life.
I feel like I should be adjusted by now but it's April and I still can't walk outside with just a skirt and tanktop and no shoes. Well, I could but I'd be cold. I have a voice inside my head that hates it here, solely for one reason, the weather. Six months of wearing hoodies and jeans and boots is too much. Not wanting to go anywhere because of the cold sucks. I never said no to going to the store because it was 115 degrees out, not once. I can't count how many times I chose to stay home because it was 10 degrees out. So because of the weather I am still struggling.
Luckily I have some good friends that are understanding. They encourage me to get out, they work out with me and they let me whine if I need to. They are letting me adjust at my own pace and don't get offended when I withdrawal a little. Without them I may have slipped into a deep depression this winter.
I am also working really hard to push the feeling I had on this day a year ago out of my body. It still lingers from time to time.
I remember thinking that we were crazy and that we should have headed south not north. Mr. Fun made the decision to move us here, I didn't protest but I did have my doubts. Living with friends was easy until it wasn't. I think living with my inlaws would have been better (and warmer). Mr. Fun wasn't going to move back home though. I guess I can't blame him either, I understand it.
We've been fortunate in the last year. Friends that went above and beyond letting us stay with them, Mr. Fun finding a temporary summer job and then getting a job right here in this little town weeks before the summer job was wrapping up. It's not easy finding jobs here, I didn't know that when we moved here. Had I known this I may have protested moving here. I feel fortunate that it worked out the way it did. Although I have some regrets and certain things I wish I could go back and change. I can't change what has happened so I am trying to let it go. Holding onto it isn't healthy, I know this. I also know I don't want to live here forever, it's too cold for too long.
It is beautiful here and the people are awesome.
I'm learning to deal with the cold, very slowly, and focusing on the positive.
We have our own house
Mr. Fun has a job
Boys are playing baseball again (even though it's windy and cold out there)
The girl is graduating and enjoying her senior year
Would I jump at a chance to move back to Phoenix, YES! I wouldn't even want to weigh the pros and cons, I would just leap. It's beautiful there as well and the people there also rock!! And I miss them, a lot. Phoenix will always be home to me.
I hear that things happen for a reason and I do believe that. The girl said to me "I don't think there is a reason we are here, I think there is a reason we are not there" (meaning Modesto, not Phoenix). I do believe this. Then you have those people that say God has a plan for you guys and this is part of it, you may not see it now but you will. You can guess that those people don't know me or my husband very well. I struggle with God and my faith, a lot. I want to believe there is a God but I'm not convinced. I can't let go and think some higher power is in charge, I just can't. I can't let my kids out the door and think there is some higher power looking over them....I can't.
I'm going to stop there because I'm getting off track....
This is me being okay with living here, ask me in a couple months when school is out and the weather is hot....I bet I say I love it.
I feel like I should be adjusted by now but it's April and I still can't walk outside with just a skirt and tanktop and no shoes. Well, I could but I'd be cold. I have a voice inside my head that hates it here, solely for one reason, the weather. Six months of wearing hoodies and jeans and boots is too much. Not wanting to go anywhere because of the cold sucks. I never said no to going to the store because it was 115 degrees out, not once. I can't count how many times I chose to stay home because it was 10 degrees out. So because of the weather I am still struggling.
Luckily I have some good friends that are understanding. They encourage me to get out, they work out with me and they let me whine if I need to. They are letting me adjust at my own pace and don't get offended when I withdrawal a little. Without them I may have slipped into a deep depression this winter.
I am also working really hard to push the feeling I had on this day a year ago out of my body. It still lingers from time to time.
I remember thinking that we were crazy and that we should have headed south not north. Mr. Fun made the decision to move us here, I didn't protest but I did have my doubts. Living with friends was easy until it wasn't. I think living with my inlaws would have been better (and warmer). Mr. Fun wasn't going to move back home though. I guess I can't blame him either, I understand it.
We've been fortunate in the last year. Friends that went above and beyond letting us stay with them, Mr. Fun finding a temporary summer job and then getting a job right here in this little town weeks before the summer job was wrapping up. It's not easy finding jobs here, I didn't know that when we moved here. Had I known this I may have protested moving here. I feel fortunate that it worked out the way it did. Although I have some regrets and certain things I wish I could go back and change. I can't change what has happened so I am trying to let it go. Holding onto it isn't healthy, I know this. I also know I don't want to live here forever, it's too cold for too long.
It is beautiful here and the people are awesome.
I'm learning to deal with the cold, very slowly, and focusing on the positive.
We have our own house
Mr. Fun has a job
Boys are playing baseball again (even though it's windy and cold out there)
The girl is graduating and enjoying her senior year
Would I jump at a chance to move back to Phoenix, YES! I wouldn't even want to weigh the pros and cons, I would just leap. It's beautiful there as well and the people there also rock!! And I miss them, a lot. Phoenix will always be home to me.
I hear that things happen for a reason and I do believe that. The girl said to me "I don't think there is a reason we are here, I think there is a reason we are not there" (meaning Modesto, not Phoenix). I do believe this. Then you have those people that say God has a plan for you guys and this is part of it, you may not see it now but you will. You can guess that those people don't know me or my husband very well. I struggle with God and my faith, a lot. I want to believe there is a God but I'm not convinced. I can't let go and think some higher power is in charge, I just can't. I can't let my kids out the door and think there is some higher power looking over them....I can't.
I'm going to stop there because I'm getting off track....
This is me being okay with living here, ask me in a couple months when school is out and the weather is hot....I bet I say I love it.
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