I've been doing this mothering thing a long time. Not as long as some but longer than others. I am still no expert and I am still learning, 21 years ago I became a mom and I am still learning. I will admit tough love is not one of my strengths, but when it needs to be applied I reach deep and I tough love the shit out of my kids. Do I always get it right, hell no, but my batting average is pretty good. It helps that I have a partner that has my back and we agree on 98% of things pertaining to raising these kids. I'm more relaxed on more things, like skipping school, as long as they have straight A's, a day off isn't going to do them any harm. I know I need a mental health day now again, so why shouldn't they get one? Does anyone ever shame me for this, not yet. Do I get shamed for other things, well, people sure do try but I rise above and let it roll off my back because we can't all agree on everything. We also can't all parent the same, see, we are all wired differently, our kids are wired differently.
As I scroll Facebook I see all kinds of shaming from how we feed our kids to whether or not we circumcise our boys. This is when I get all red in the face and my skin tingles from the inside. I understand being passionate, I get that, but to shame another parent because you disagree with their opinions or how they do things has to stop! IT HAS TO STOP! We can educate without shaming. We can share information without shaming. Spewing your opinion without taking other's into consideration also needs to stop. Yes, freedom of speech, yada yada yada...What about compassion and empathy? Put yourself in another parents shoes before you speak. You can educate without hate, trust me, I do it whenever the opportunity arises.
So before you post anything about how a woman chooses to give birth or is forced to give birth, or how they choose or must feed their child, THINK! I remember parenting before social media, it was so much easier. I never had to read rude things about how I was parenting, it was really something and my heart breaks a little for all the new moms with so much judging coming from so many different directions. The hate in this world is growing and we need to bring the love back. Let's love each other even though we parent differently. Heck, I parent each of my kids differently. If I can't even parent all of my 4 kids the same what makes someone think everyone should parent all kids the way they parent? That thought is asinine. It's impossible, every child is different, every child responds to situations differently.
Let's face the fact, not everyone can breastfeed, not everyone wants to. Their child their choice. Some parents spank, I only ever spanked one of my children. I only breastfed two children, I also only vaccinated two children. See, my children my choice. You can disagree with me but no matter your opinion it won't change how I do things. Now if you wanted to share some facts and educate me then please do but know I may not change my mind, and that's okay. You can go on and on with your opinion and why you chose to do it differently than me and I may never change my opinion on it. You will just have to be okay with it because I'm okay with how you parent your child, see it's your child, not mine.
Soon enough kids grow up and you no longer make choices for them, they make choices for themselves so let's not get too caught up in how everyone else parents. Let's focus on raising our own kids. Let us raise good, kind, respectful adults. Isn't that what is most important?
So all you new moms, yes, ask for advice but in the end know they are your children and your final decision only has to be what you feel is the right decision.
As I scroll Facebook I see all kinds of shaming from how we feed our kids to whether or not we circumcise our boys. This is when I get all red in the face and my skin tingles from the inside. I understand being passionate, I get that, but to shame another parent because you disagree with their opinions or how they do things has to stop! IT HAS TO STOP! We can educate without shaming. We can share information without shaming. Spewing your opinion without taking other's into consideration also needs to stop. Yes, freedom of speech, yada yada yada...What about compassion and empathy? Put yourself in another parents shoes before you speak. You can educate without hate, trust me, I do it whenever the opportunity arises.
So before you post anything about how a woman chooses to give birth or is forced to give birth, or how they choose or must feed their child, THINK! I remember parenting before social media, it was so much easier. I never had to read rude things about how I was parenting, it was really something and my heart breaks a little for all the new moms with so much judging coming from so many different directions. The hate in this world is growing and we need to bring the love back. Let's love each other even though we parent differently. Heck, I parent each of my kids differently. If I can't even parent all of my 4 kids the same what makes someone think everyone should parent all kids the way they parent? That thought is asinine. It's impossible, every child is different, every child responds to situations differently.
Let's face the fact, not everyone can breastfeed, not everyone wants to. Their child their choice. Some parents spank, I only ever spanked one of my children. I only breastfed two children, I also only vaccinated two children. See, my children my choice. You can disagree with me but no matter your opinion it won't change how I do things. Now if you wanted to share some facts and educate me then please do but know I may not change my mind, and that's okay. You can go on and on with your opinion and why you chose to do it differently than me and I may never change my opinion on it. You will just have to be okay with it because I'm okay with how you parent your child, see it's your child, not mine.
Soon enough kids grow up and you no longer make choices for them, they make choices for themselves so let's not get too caught up in how everyone else parents. Let's focus on raising our own kids. Let us raise good, kind, respectful adults. Isn't that what is most important?
So all you new moms, yes, ask for advice but in the end know they are your children and your final decision only has to be what you feel is the right decision.
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